Tantra: The Art of Conscious Loving

By Charles and Caroline Muir

Charles and Caroline MuirWe often hear that there has been a “sexual revolution” which began in the early sixties. Many feel that this revolution is dead, some having tried all there is to try sexually, and are growing bored with it. I believe that the sexual revolution of the sixties was the initial phase of a sexual “evolution.” The 60’s seeds of a woman’s right to pleasure and power in the world have flowered in the 80’s. As we approach the end of the 80’s, we are beginning to understand that feminine energy is awakening consciousness and healing the planet. Tantric wisdom states that as a woman awakens her sexual center (second chakra) she naturally awakens her spiritual power.

It is time for the battle of the sexes to end, so that men and women can join in sexual wholeness. If we can bring some of the consciousness we have evolved over the last ten years, some of the light, wisdom and heart into our sexuality, these things will transform the very nature of sexuality. It will no longer be sex as we know it: it will be something totally different, so different that we will need a new name for it. In ancient India, this was called Tantra.

Like all paths of Yoga, Tantra deals with the realization of the Light within, that image we are created in. Unlike all other paths of Yoga, which advocate a celibate life-style to build up and transmute sexual energy into spiritual energy, Tantra proposes that this energy can be increased and raised to its highest expression through proper sharing and joining with one’s spiritual partner.

I’d like to share for your consideration some of my observations based on what I see happening around me. We are living in a time of change and expanded consciousness. We are more open than ever before, which results in thinking differently, caring for ourselves and studying ourselves in different ways. This leads to understanding ourselves, others and the world in different ways. We live at a time when knowledge is more available to us than ever before – both ancient knowledge and new concepts. Like many “new age” modalities, Tantra has its roots in ancient understandings from the Orient. These concepts have evolved with new insights which are valid for today.

Contrary to what the ego would have us believe, we are not born naturally good at sex and relationships. Even though we are children of the sexual revolution, we are still largely conditioned by belief systems which no longer work for us. At the foundation of our sexual structure, is the typical early conditioning which filled us with guilt, fear, insecurity and shame. This conditioning still drastically affects our ability to receive and transmit love and energy sexually, both to our partner and to our self. Even if we haven’t built an ugly sexual structure, and have a comparatively beautiful sex life much of the time, the foundation is still shaky and results in periodic relationship problems, sexual insecurities, less ability to enjoy sexual sharing and rarely as a journey into the spiritual potential of sexual love.

We must remember that our formal education about the great mysteries of sexual union has usually been gleaned from limited personal experience. The combination of our early conditioning and lack of formal education leaves most people in an interesting predicament: It leaves them not knowing how to feel or give love sexually, nor how to mix passion and intimacy in that beautiful blend that sexual loving can be. In ancient India, Tantra Yoga was taught as an art form that every evolved male and female was versed in.

Tantric Loving infuses more consciousness, energy, intimacy and love into our sexual exchanges. This transforms sex into an extended meditation which affects us on every level of our being: physical, mental, emotional, energetic and spiritual.

Though many of the rituals and practices of ancient Tantra are not valid or appropriate for people of a 20th Century Judeo-Christian heritage, most techniques and concepts of Tantra can still serve us to great advantage.
Tantra has both exoteric and esoteric sides. The esoteric studies center around balancing the male and female energies within us, awakening the consciousness inherent in the chakra system and awakening the Kundalini (the spirit which is holy that resides at the base of the spine). When Kundalini awakens and ascends the spine it brings about enlightenment, which is our birthright.

The exoteric side of Tantra deals with studies in three important areas:
1) WAYS TO INCREASE ENERGETIC FLOW AND PLEASURE: These include techniques to harmonize moods and energy fields; esoteric kissing; transformative touching; varied positions; the man learning to use the lingam (penis) as an energetic wand of light, as a master artist uses a paint brush; the woman learning to consciously squeeze and play the yoni (vagina) like a multi-stringed instrument of exquisite beauty; exotic, little known pleasure techniques which have been handed down through the ages; and energetic mudras to influence energy flows. All of these areas of study allow the body to become an instrument of love.

2) METHODS TO INCREASE INTIMACY: The techniques to increase passion and energetic flow by themselves are not enough to carry a couple to the high octave, transcendent loving that Tantra is meant to be. In order to do this we must learn to increase our ability to be intimate. The word “intimacy” has its root with “innermost”: To allow my innermost light and love out and to let yours in. It sounds simple, but it is in practice quite difficult, because we’ve all been hurt and scarred on the path of love. For each of us there are unconscious memories of “if I love deeply, I will be hurt or abandoned.” So Tantra teaches the techniques that enable us to heal emotionally and connect with our heart more deeply. These techniques are crucial!

3) TECHNIQUES TO INCREASE FOCUS: The third area of study covers the techniques to increase our mind’s ability to be fully present during our sexual loving. Have you ever noticed how the mind almost seems to take a perverse delight in filling us with thoughts and fears during our sexual loving? Even highly conscious meditators are often filled with thoughts that don’t serve them during sexual sharing. The nature of the mind to wander, daydream, fantasize and worry often short-circuits sexual energy causing a variety of problems to surface. In Tantra, we learn techniques to quiet the thinking mind and activate the feeling mind so that the beauty and power of this meditation maybe fully experienced. Once the mind is quiet, a variety of esoteric techniques to awaken new consciousness and deepen the experience are utilized.

It is the mastery of all three of these areas which allows the practitioner to experience states of ecstatic bliss and universal oneness.
Tantra is a path to loving yourself, your neighbor and your God. Ultimately, it leads to an ability to feel God in everything. Like other paths of Yoga, Tantra brings recognition of the image we are created in and brings forth that inner kingdom outward to the earth. Tantra brings realization that we are still sons and daughters of God – innocent, pure, strong, wise and loving. This happens by changing the nature of sex into a loving meditation, a type of prayer where the body becomes an instrument for the expression of love. As we walk the path of Tantra, it heals, opens and unfolds us. Tantra brings profound joy, peace and the sense of love which can only come about from being connected and centered in the heart.

Each of us has the power to change the nature of sex into a spiritual practice which is regenerative and integrative for body, mind and soul.
Isn’t it time to put our expanded consciousness into our sexuality, to break old misconceptions and conditioning which have caused us so much pain and to find new and better ways to share our love in sexual communion?

The great mysteries of sexual energy and sexual communion have been lost during the last 2500 years and corrupted in ways which have caused us much suffering. We should remember that sex is God’s invention and it is mankind who corrupted it. Perhaps your God would have you know a better way.

Charles and Caroline Muir live on Maui, Hawaii. They teach weekend and week-long vacation seminars on Tantra in Hawaii, Mainland US and Mexico.
For more information write: Source Seminars PO Box 69-A, Paia, Maui, Hawaii. 96779, (808)572-8364, fax (808)579-8452

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